Tuesday, April 1, 2008

All for what?

Sunday evening, March 30, 2008, my sister Ruth was admitted to the hospice wing at our local hospital to stabilize her meds and move into their hospice house to live out her final days. She was only diagnosed with ALS in January, three short months ago. It is a scary fiery crash.

She signed a Do Not Resuscitate order and will not get the feeding tube that can keep her alive. I guess she is tired of fighting this, and I don't blame her.

I have failed her........I couldn't save her, I couldn't fix "it", I couldn't get what she needed to stay ahead of this.

It is best that I truly learn what that means and let her go........this is my last attempt at ALS advocacy, albeit, it is to surrender.

The only thing that I can hope for now is that someday, ALS will wreak it's havoc on some influential person and their famous family.

Someday, ALS will kill the "wrong person", then something will be done to help people with ALS and their families all over the world who suffer mercilessly with the freight-train-like ravages of this disease.

Dear God; it just makes me want to vomit to even think that........

Pat Harbachuk (CALS, sister) to Ruth Rogers

My sister Ruth went from the photo at the top to the one at the bottom in three short months. It is frightening.

1 comment:

juri said...

Dear Pat,

I am so sorry that your sister has a fast moving form of ALS.

Please,...you "DID NOT" fail her. You have been the best sister that there is to be. Until there is a cure, it does not seem to be a good way out of this disease.

Please remember that you are an amazing sister to Ruth. (I wished that, my older sister and I are anywhere close to the sister-love relationship that you have. I'll be lucky is she vists me once a month just to say "Hi".)

I know that you will continue to fight for the rest of us.

Thanks Pat,